Rejection is OK...Lean In
Updated: Nov 19
Above...Just for fun....me attempting to catch a waterfall.... a thought on Rejection and some poor guy and his dog being "rejected by bees"...on to the story.
My bags of "worn-yet-wonderful" goods were perfectly packed. They looked almost, but not quite, purposefully styled. The consignment store ran by appointment only, with only one available slot left… 4:30pm on #%*? Friday! Inside, I cursed that Marie Kondo book that has everyone clearing their chi by clearing their closets. I smiled with cheeky-yet-cautious confidence. My closets exhaled freely. It is a buoyant bouncy freedom to get out from the weight of unneeded stuff! And, truth? I felt confident my bags would delight those two at the consignment shop who procure items for store sale-aka decide your personal consignment fate. I opened the door my head twisted into a double take. Was I in the right place? The hipster dressed clerk shrugged, “Yeah, when we closed for COVID, we remodeled.” She continued chewing her gum as she pointed me towards the procurers. My feet shuffled under the weight of my offerings as I attempted a cold step up to the counter. “Just put your bags there, and keep your phone nearby. We’ll text ya when we’re done,” the lead procurer tutored. Cautiously, I scanned the store. From where I was, if I walked around the jeans and bypassed the dishes, I could stay a glorious six feet from others and make my way to the furniture section. Foiled again. The furniture section was cramped like a fresh can of snuff, with two workers busily arranging as if playing furniture Tetris. I did mental parkour as I sauntered (as cooly as I could muster) past used silky evening gowns and lingerie. I landed outside on the sidewalk. I breathed in deeply, glorious, fresh, wild air! I exhaled, pulled my phone from my pocket, no text yet. I gathered courage to glance into the store window, ostensibly to see if they had reviewed my goods yet.
My phone buzzed. The jury was back! Arriving at the counter, wait… what…? My original three bags, sitting there in a row, all still full of my stuff! Did the store want it all? Did they want nothing? “We found two pairs of pants and these boots. The rest just isn’t our style.” They said authoritatively, thereby dismissing me. “Not your style…?” I stammered, looking baffled while inside, I pouted and growled.
Instantly I felt that sinking feeling… you know the one. It catches in the throat and leads to a warm stinging blush all the way down to the toes. I felt the pain of rejection. Personal rejection. After all, these were my chosen things that had (HAVE) value! What to do with this? Here’s the six step process I used to rid myself of that pain that goes with rejection:
Feel. I was angry, so I allowed myself to be miffed
Find support. I phoned a friend for solace, and to gather that “I was not alone” in this consignment rejection experience
Laugh. I let humor take over, we laughed hard at our shared consignment woes
Seek solutions. My friend shared that she gave up on consignment. She just donates her stuff
Decide. I took in her points and decided I’m not done yet. I’m gonna give consignment another try
Act. I haven’t returned to the world of consignment yet, however I will climb atop that donkey and head to another store soon with my wares. The ass may be just the right transportation... only time and renewed bravery will tell!
One thing I know for sure is that in life and in business, there will be rejection and it can be a positive when we take time to go through the steps and seek the possibilities associated with it. Perhaps it is a way to connect with another, perhaps we learn something, perhaps it brings us closer to what we are really seeking. Rejection will always be a part of life. We need to deal with it and lean into it in ways that work for us. Ultimately, then, we can let it go so we can move on to other opportunities.
Solopreneurs and solo entrepreneurs, I am a holistic business coach. I can help you to clarify your big picture business strategies and develop practical action steps to make your dreams and ideas come to life.